I have a (possibly unrealistic) goal of finishing my revisions of draft 3 before November so that I can (theoretically) participate in NaNoWriMo. I tend to do it every other year, and this is supposed to be one of my “on” years. Guilting myself keeps me making progress on ETD, and while making that goal looks to be challenging, I don’t think it’s impossible.
But then I started to wonder — do I really want to complete revisions on this draft on October 31 and throw myself into the frenzy of something new November 1? What ever happened to taking a “break” between projects? Not to mention the fact that I don’t really want to give my boss, my clients, my boyfriend, my pets, my friends, or my family the shaft as I try to find a way to squeeze out 2,000 words in a day. Wouldn’t it be better if I could languish throughout October and daydream and jot notes for the brilliance that will happen in November? The truth is, while I’ve fantasized about my upcoming Rapunzel retelling (the most likely candidate should I choose to accept the NaNo challenge), I know that squeezing 50,000 words out of my current ideas and schedule may just be a little crazy.
Of course, there’s also this part of me that says I’m just making excuses. Still, I’m beginning to wonder if tackling another NaNoWriMo might be a bit irresponsible. Not because my dishes tend to pile up even worse in November, or because I eat frozen meals all month, or because I become glued at the hip to my laptop, or because I get less sleep, or because I’m a bore to be around because all I can think/talk about is my novel. No, it’s because I have seven novels that are all waiting to be revised and polished and — dare I say it? — submitted (OK, so at least one of those has no business being revised and submitted, but still). And I keep telling myself that I will not start a new project until I’ve put some honest time and energy into marketing what I’ve got. Sometimes I think starting a new novel is just a way for me to avoid what it takes to become the kind of writer I want to be — one that gets published. And doesn’t NaNoWriMo just play right into that? I know some people need NaNo to motivate them to write novels at all — but motivating myself to write novels has never really been an issue for me.
In some ways, I feel like a woman who is considering getting pregnant again even though she isn’t properly feeding and caring for the multitude of children she’s already birthed, just because new life is so exciting. But it’s not November yet. And until then, I’ve got plenty to do wiping the grime off the stories that already exist.